First dates are crucial and if they don’t go well you’re pretty much guaranteed to never see your date again. So, here are 10 important first date tips that will increase your chances of landing a second date:
1. Put Effort Into Your Appearance
You should always put effort into how you look for your dates. Don’t show up like you just rolled out of bed and couldn’t even brush your hair. Look like someone you would want to date. Remember, you’re supposed to be putting your best foot forward on your first dates and you’re not doing that if you look like something the cat dragged in.
Check out my article 6 Must Dos Before A Date for more tips on getting yourself together before a date. If you have trouble finding the right first date outfit, check out my article Are You Picking The Wrong First Date Outfits?
2. Get To Know Your Date The Right Way
Never treat your dates like interviews. You should be getting to know your date through engaging, mutual conversation and not a drawn out Q and A session. You want your date to feel comfortable, not scrutinized and judged so you have to fight the urge to interview your date.
3. Never Talk About Exes
Talking about an ex or exes on first dates is a huge mood killer and it reduces your ability to make a great connection with the person you’re with. You also don’t want your date to get the impression that you aren’t over your ex. You should be focused on enjoying the company of your date, not sharing your love war stories or the trials and tribulations of dating.
4. Avoid Sensitive Subjects
In order to increase your chances of making a great connection on a date, you have to avoid sensitive topics like religion and politics. The time will come to have these conversations, but your first few dates with a man is not it.
5. Don’t Talk About Your Problems
Talking about your problems or flaws on a first date is a huge downer! Not to mention the fact that you will most likely make your date feel uncomfortable. Your dates should be light-hearted and fun, not dark and awkward. Your date is not there to fix your problems, but he can make you feel better without you having to address them if you allow him to show you a good time.
6. Don’t Tell Sad Stories
Dates are supposed to be fun and enjoyable, but just like with talking about your problems, telling sad stories will bring down the mood and make your date feel uncomfortable.
7. Don’t Drink Heavily
You shouldn’t drink heavily on first dates, if at all. Having more than 1-2 drinks on your first date can cause more problems than you realize. My article 4 Problems with Drinking on First Dates explains why.
8. Smile
Many people don’t realize how important it is to smile. Smiles are inviting and they can actually disarm people and get them to open up to you much more. You want your date to let down his guard and feel relaxed with you, smiling will help accomplish this.
9. Mind Your Body language
Body language communicates more than we know. If you have your arms crossed, for example, your date might feel like your closed off and not interested in him. Sitting with your arms crossed puts up a barrier and makes it more difficult to connect with your date and have a good time. In fact, you’re definitely not having a good time if your arms are crossed. So, loosen up, uncross those arms, and really interact with your date.
For more tips on improving your body language on dates, check out my article 5 Tips For Better Dating Body Language.
10. Have Fun!
The most important thing you need to do on your dates is enjoy yourself. If you’re interested in getting married one day, then you want a boyfriend that you can enjoy life with and your first date is your opportunity to see whether this is possible. Forget all your lists, forget what his future goals are, and just see if your date is a man whose company you enjoy.
Check out my article Increase Your Chances of Making a Connection to see how you can improve the connections you make on dates.
For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.
Till Next Time,
Dee
Dee's Dating Diary 