For those of you who are not familiar with the Netflix and chill date, it’s basically a date where you hang out at someone’s home and watch Netflix together.
Here’s the catch, the men that propose these kind of “dates” aren’t interested in having a real date with you. Instead, that want to lay on the couch or bed with you while watching a movie to make it easier for them to make a pass at you and get in your pants.
The Purpose of Netflix And Chill
The Netflix and chill date is really not a date at all. It’s the least amount of effort that a man can put into getting to know you. As a matter of fact, a man who wants to watch Netflix and chill most likely doesn’t really care about getting to know who you are.
He just wants to get you in an environment that will make it easy for him to come on to you. While many women know what to expect if they’re invited to Netflix and chill, some women are surprised to learn that the purpose of the date was for some no-strings-attached fun.
Of course, if you’ve already gone out on other dates, outside the home, then there’s nothing wrong with being invited over to Netflix and chill. However, your first three or four dates should be outside of each other’s home so that having premature sex won’t be an option.
And you’ll give yourself and your date the opportunity to really get to know each other and see if there is potential for a future relationship.
Do You Want A Relationship or Netflix And Chill Nights?
The reality is, men use Netflix and chill as a way to sleep with women as quickly as possible and with as little effort as necessary to accomplish that goal. If you don’t want just have a casual, sexual relationship, you don’t want to start off on that foot.
If you’re interested in more than just sex, you have to act that way and accepting a Netflix and chill date where you end up sleeping with a man too soon does not bring you any closer to attaining that.
Now there are women who claim to be equally interested in sex on the first date as men, but a lot of these women eventually come to regret their decision to move quickly on the first date when they realize the man they slept with is no longer showing any interest.
Will Rejecting A Netflix And Chill Date Get You A Relationship?
I’m not saying that rejecting the Netflix and chill date will land you in a relationship with a man, but I am saying that you increase your chances of growing what you have into a relationship if you get to know the man you’re dating before sleeping with him and give him a chance to do the same.
You might even get to know a man and realize that he isn’t right for you at all, so by not jumping into the Netflix and chill date too soon, you give yourself an opportunity to see if a man is compatible with you before you go as far as sleeping with him.
Want To Know If He’s Interested In More Than Just Sex?
If you want to know if a man is interested in more than just sex, kindly turn down his suggestion for a Netflix and chill date and let him know that you’d like to get out of the house and do something fun or grab a bite or a drink.
If he’s still trying to pressure you into a Netflix and chill night or isn’t receptive to doing anything else, this man only sees you as an opportunity for sex and nothing more.
Two weeks ago, I put an informal survey up on my blog asking, “Are you okay with Netflix and chill dates?” While I did not specify whether it was for a first date or otherwise, I found it interesting that 40% of those surveyed answered “yes,” 40% said “no,” and 20% chose “other.”
What are your thoughts on Netflix and chill for a first date? Let me know in the comments below!
For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.
Till Next Time,
Though I’ve never had a “Netflix and chill” date, I would definitely be open to it. I respect women who know what they want. I feel it’s more women who want to be intimate than people think. And it’s already hard enough to date… I’m down for whatever.
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Thanks for checking out my post and sharing your thoughts!
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I am one who prefers coffee and a walk, winter and in summer, ice cream and a walk. A meal has some implication to men that I then owe them (what?!) Yes, this line has been said more than a dozen times.
I also feel stuck if I accept a dinner date on a first date. Especially if someone I have never spent time with at a party or work before.
Definitely, Not a Netflix and Chill woman.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts! It’s unfortunate that some men believe they are owed something by taking you out to dinner, but thankfully that’s not all men and chivalry isn’t dead!
He’s been my friend since 6th grade, and my best friend since 8th. A few weeks ago, we had our first sort of date. We went over to his, and started a series on Netflix, and had a wonderful dinner. We did it again a week later. We think we’re probably dating, but we haven’t really defined it. We’re only about 16, and we’re in high school, so no naughty things, just a tickle war. So, I’m fine with Netflix and chill dates so far.