Is Your Laundry List Holding You Back From Getting A Quality Man?

Image courtesy of StockImages at

Image courtesy of StockImages at

Many women have an image of who their ideal partner would be based on certain characteristics they possess. The problem? Their laundry list.

The Laundry List

A laundry list is basically a list of things a woman wants in a man.

The problem with the laundry list is that most of the attributes on these lists don’t necessarily speak to a man being a quality person that you should date.

Many women’s laundry list reads like this: Must make over 100k (or insert any amount here), must be physically fit, must be tall, must have this type of car, and the list goes on.

While it’s definitely necessary to have an idea of the type of man that’s a good match for you, your laundry list should have more depth. The items on this list should address qualities that are common to good men.

Image courtesy of Digitalart at

Image courtesy of Digitalart at

Make A Viable List

Here’s a helpful exercise to help you widdle down your laundry list to the most important qualities you want in a man.

First, write down all the things you feel you want in a long term partner.

Second, choose 3 to 5 items on your list that aren’t references to superficial qualities.

Superficial qualities would be income, physique, car, etc. These things are superficial because they can easily change and don’t address any characteristics that make up a good man.

These 3 to 5 items are the only items that you should deeply contemplate when picking a man to date.

Image courtesy of Photostock at

Image courtesy of Photostock at

Reality Check

I know it would be nice to have the rest of the things that are on your list, but let those other items be bonuses and not deal-breakers.

You should be extremely flexible in those items that are outside of your core 3 to 5 attributes.

Get real with your laundry list and don’t let it hold you back from getting the quality man you really want to date!

For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve

Till Next Time,



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4 Problems with Drinking on First Dates

Image courtesy of Imagerymajestic/

Image courtesy of Imagerymajestic/

When you go out on a date, you hope to have great conversation and make a great connection. But sometimes, nervous or anxious feelings prevent us from maximizing our connection with a date.

For some people, drinking alcohol seems like a great way to loosen up and make the date a more fluid and enjoyable one.

However, while alcohol may temporarily ease that nervous energy, there’s a fine line between easing your tension and destroying the possibility of making a genuine connection with your date.

Image courtesy of Marin /

Image courtesy of Marin /

What’s Wrong With Drinking on First Dates?

Alcohol can easily have a negative effect on your date. You may become a little too loosened up by the alcohol, which could lead to a number of problems on the date.

Here are 4 problems with drinking on first dates:

  1. You might divulge way too much information too soon (To find out what “too much information too soon” is, check out my post on the topic Here);
  2. You might bring up inappropriate first date topics like religion, politics, exes, and more;
  3. You might make inappropriate comments that offend your date; and
  4. You might have a false sense that you made a real connection with your date.
Image courtesy of Stockimages /

Image courtesy of Stockimages /

False Sense Of Making A Connection

One of the worst problems with drinking on first dates is the fact that the alcohol could lead you to feeling that you’ve made a genuine connection with your date when, in fact, you haven’t made a connection at all.

By the end of the date, you may feel much closer to your date and “connected” while your date feels annoyed, offended, or completely disinterested.

Consuming alcohol makes it more difficult to recognize those subtle clues that let you know whether someone is interested in you or not.

In fact, alcohol can make you flat out misinterpret social cues that tell you a person is uncomfortable with your behavior, language, or conversation topics

Image courtesy of Cbenjasuwan /

Image courtesy of Cbenjasuwan /

Make A Love Connection!

In order to increase your chances of making a genuine connection or recognizing when there isn’t one, stick to ONE alcoholic drink on your date.

If you’re a more frequent or regular drinker, then you may bump this up to two. But, under no circumstances should you have more than 1-2 drinks on your first few dates!

Digital Romance Inc.

I’ve written an article for Digital Romance Inc. and it will be published on their website tomorrow! This is definitely a read you don’t want to miss!!

I’m really excited to write for Digital Romance Inc! Their “goal is to give you solutions to the entire range of relationship problems that people have been experiencing for… well, for as long as people have had relationships.”

Check out my website tomorrow for a direct link to my article!

For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve

Till Next Time,


8 Things Guys Secretly Love

James Michael Sama

Whether a guy is just starting to date a woman or is in a committed relationship with her, there are small things that she may do without thinking twice that guys secretly love.

While there are many, here are eight to start.


Laying your head on his chest.

When laying on the couch watching TV or laying in bed after a long day, it’s one of the best feelings when a woman lays her head down on your chest and puts her arm over you.

As men, we enjoy feeling as though we are being protective, and this signifies that she feels safe in our arms.

When you text him first.

There is a lot of pressure on guys to always initiate conversation. Sometimes he may not know if he’s being too pushy or texting too much – he might overthink it and not text you at all, which could…

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