It’s Easier To Leave Than To Be Left

Posted on March 7, 2015 by Dee's Dating Diary

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When you’re in a relationship and your boyfriend has to leave town for a trip or some other reason, you probably find it hard to watch him leave.

You may even feel alone because the time you would normally spend with your boyfriend becomes a void or a gap.

The funny thing is, when it’s you that has to leave town it’s not as hard to leave as it is to be left by your boyfriend.

When you’re leaving for a trip, leisurely or work-related, it’s easier to leave because you have something to look forward to or your time will be occupied for the most part.

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Who Has It Easier In A Break Up?

Now, turning this to break ups, it’s also always easier to break up with a boyfriend than to be broken up with.

This obviously isn’t the case if you’re breaking up with your boyfriend because of cheating or some other wrong.

Truthfully though, there’s something about having control over the break up that gives you an element of ease. You weren’t blindsided by the break up, you thought the decision through, and you decided the best move for yourself was to move on.

With these things in mind, you obviously wouldn’t be as torn up over the break up since you’re the person that decided to end it.

So, it’s really true in many aspects actually, it’s always easier to leave than be left!

For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Till Next Time,

Dee

Wondering Why Men Come Back In Your Life?

Posted on February 21, 2015 by Dee's Dating Diary

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I wrote a post called Red Flag: Does he pull disappearing acts? and I got some really great comments from people sharing their experiences with the dreadful “disappearing act.”

In a comment I was asked:

“If he’s just not into me, I get it. If he has other girls or a girlfriend, I can let him go. Whatever his reason for disappearing out of my life, I can deal with that. But it’s the constant REAPPEARING that I don’t understand. If you do not want to be with me then why not leave me alone? Why stop talking to me then try talking to me again? Is it about sex? Is this a power or control thing for him? Does this boost his self-esteem? What is his deal?”

I wanted to address this question in a post because many women have asked themselves these questions too.

The Re-Appearing Act

It’s certainly shocking to a woman when she goes from regularly communicating with a man to not getting any replies from her texts or calls.

And as if going MIA wasn’t bad enough, some men choose to further perplex women by coming back into the picture like nothing happened.

Maybe he tells you he lost his phone or perhaps he went all out and said he was in the hospital. Regardless of the excuse (and they’re all just that, excuses), it’s never okay for a man to ignore your texts and calls for days or weeks.

If a man is genuinely interested in you, he’s not going to disappear off the face of the earth then pop back in your life a week or months later.

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Why Do They Re-Appear?

Do men reappear in your life because of sex, power and control, or self-esteem? The answer truly depends on the man. There’s actually no one-size fits all answer to this.

The most important point to take away from this is that, if he really wants to be with you, he’s not going to disappear from your life for days or weeks, period.

But, if you decide to give a man another chance after his disappearing act, don’t be upset when he does it to you again down the line.

Whether it’s a break up or the disappearing act, many men will contact you again in the future. And, you can’t let your decision to date a man be based on whether he ever reaches out to you again.

If a man wasn’t right for you or he flat out disappeared on you, it shouldn’t matter that he reached out to you again. Don’t let a bad blast from the past set you back in your dating life.

For more great dating advice, check out my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Till Next Time,

Dee

A Great Valentine’s Day Isn’t Just For Couples!

Posted on February 14, 2015 by Dee's Dating Diary

Valentine’s Day is certainly the most romanticized day of the year. While it’s definitely a day for love, it’s not just about being loved by your boyfriend.

Fathers and mothers often show their children love on Valentine’s Day. Whether it be with cards, gifts, candy, or simply love and affection.

Valentine’s Day is for everyone, single or not!

A Relationship Doesn’t = A Great Valentine’s Day

Too often, women put so much emphasis on having a boyfriend on Valentine’s Day.

But, as a single woman, you have to remember that being in a relationship doesn’t guarantee that you’ll have a great Valentine’s Day.

Some couples have to work on Valentine’s Day, others are in long distance relationships, and some boyfriends don’t show their girlfriends love on any other day of the year.

Despite what many women might say, being single on Valentine’s Day is not a bad thing.

Being Single On Valentine’s

If you’re single, Valentine’s Day should be all about loving yourself and the people close to you!

Instead of moping around, you need to spend time with your loved ones, pamper yourself, or do the things you really enjoy.

Call your other single friends, go out, and have a great time! Or, stay in and have a great girl’s night!

If your friends are busy, then treat yourself to something special. Get food from your favorite restaurant, buy a great bottle of wine, and catch up on those shows or movies you’ve been wanting to watch.

Or, if you don’t have a problem going out by yourself, go to a nice lounge and grab a drink. You never know, you could meet a nice guy and have great conversation if nothing more.

No matter what you do on Valentine’s Day, remember that it’s about love for yourself too!

For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Till Next Time,

Dee

Are You Following The Skin Rule On Your First Dates?

Posted on February 7, 2015 by Dee's Dating Diary

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Picking the right outfit for a date can sometime be stressful, but it’s really important to avoid the temptation to dress in extremely revealing or skimpy outfits.

You may look fabulous in your super short dress with a plunging neck line to your navel and open back, but let me tell you, this is not going to generate anything but sexual interest in you!

And, once a man labels you as a sex object, that’s all you’ll ever be!

So, keep it tasteful on your first few dates by using the skin rule.

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The Skin Rule

You can only show ONE of the following, if any:

1. Cleavage

2. Middrift

3. Legs

4. Back

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Why Do The Skin Rule?

You definitely don’t want to dress too provocatively on your first few dates so that your date will pay more attention to you and not your body.

As a woman, you have to try your best to keep a man’s mind out of the “gutter.” And, you don’t accomplish this by showing up to a date with your breast hanging out over your food.

You want a man to like you for who you are and not your body alone.

Of course, there needs to be an element of attraction but a man can still be very physically attracted to you without having to see your body through sheer or skimpy clothes.

At the end of the day, looks will fade. So, make sure your dates are developing a genuine interest for you and not just your assets!

For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Till Next Time,

Dee

How Long Is Too Long To Wait For A Wedding Ring?

Posted on January 31, 2015 by Dee's Dating Diary

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Often times, women stay in relationships with men for years waiting to get that prized engagement ring.

But, how long is too long to wait for a wedding ring?

Well, it’s hard to say exactly how long each woman should wait for a proposal because every relationship is different.

The dynamics of one relationship may warrant a longer “waiting” period than others.

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How Long Is Too Long To Wait For A Wedding Ring?

While it is difficult to put a cap on the amount of time that a woman should wait for an engagement proposal, I can say that waiting ten years should be out of the question for every woman!

In general, I believe that a woman shouldn’t stay in a relationship for longer than 3-4 years without being asked to get married.

If a man doesn’t know if he wants to marry you after 3-4 years of being in a relationship, the chances of him wanting to marry you after year 5,6, or 7 goes down drastically.

Many women stick around in relationships for years nudging and even nagging their boyfriends to settle down and get married.

But, you should never try to force a man to marry you!

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What Do You Really Want?

If you’re just looking for any warm body to call your husband and you don’t care about the quality of your relationship, then by all means honey, “do you!”

But, if you actually want a marriage filled with love instead of resentment, then stop trying to chase men into marriage.

The truth is, every woman truly wants a man that feels strongly enough for her that she doesn’t have to shove the idea of marriage down his throat to get that fantasied wedding ring.

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Know Your Worth!

Women, you have to remember your worth and know that your time is precious! Not every man is deserving of your time and certainly not half a decade or more of it!

You deserve a man that knows he wants to marry you well before 5 years into the relationship.

So, stop settling for less!

For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Till Next Time,

Dee

Related Articles You’ll Like:

Why Many Marriages Fail

Your Self-Confidence Can’t Depend on Him!!

He Can’t Complete You!

How To Answer Questions About Why You’re Single

Posted on January 24, 2015 by Dee's Dating Diary

Dear Dee’s Dating Diary,

How do you answer questions about why you’re single or why your last relationship ended?

Dear Dater,

Less is always more!

If you’ve been asked questions like these by someone you recently met, keep your answers short and sweet!

If you’re asked why you’re single, the best answer is always “you haven’t met the right person.” And, this isn’t a lie, it’s true!

If you already met the right person, you’d still be with him.

The Time Will Come To Open Up

After you’ve been on several dates, if you’re asked details about why your past relationship ended you can open up a bit more. But, remember, the new person you’re dating doesn’t need all the nitty gritty details.

When you’ve been dating someone for awhile, of course you’ll have to speak more openly about why it ended with your ex.

If a past relationship ended as a result of your own bad behavior, own up to what you did and be sure to tell the person how you learned from that mistake and that you’d never do that to someone again.

It’s easy to scare new dates off with what they may perceive as problems that you have. Too much information too soon can definitely kill a potential relationship. Check out the post I wrote about this: One Thing That Kills A Potential Relationship is…

For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Yours Truly,

Dee

Ask Dee’s Dating Diary A Dating Question!

Posted on January 17, 2015 by Dee's Dating Diary

Need Dating or Relationship Advice?

Do you have a dating question you’d like to ask Dee’s Dating Diary?

Whether it’s a general question about dating or a specific relationship issue you’re having, Dee’s Dating Diary has your answer!

You can submit your questions using the contact form below!

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Share The Knowledge!

Your dating question will be answered in a direct email to you, but it may also appear on Dee’s Dating Diary in the form of a post.

Don’t worry, no identifying information will be put in the post and you will remain completely anonymous.

Your question will only be used to provide others with the same great dating advice that you receive!

So, stop stressing and dealing with your dating problems alone, contact Dee’s Dating Diary today!

For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Till Next Time,

Dee

Not Happy With Your Online Dating Website?

Posted on January 10, 2015 by Dee's Dating Diary

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Today, there’s so many online dating websites out there, not to mention numerous sites that cater to specific interests.

So, with all these online dating websites to choose from, how do you know if you picked the right site?

Really, you don’t know. And, if you’re having trouble meeting new dates then it’s time to branch out and try some different dating sites!

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Why Join Multiple Online Dating Websites?

If you’re having trouble keeping up with a single online dating website, then you definitely want to stick to one site for now.

But, if you’re not having any success with the one dating site that you are on, then you should definitely join one or two more online dating sites.

The truth is, not every person that uses online dating registers with every different online dating website that’s out there.

So, if you join more than one dating site, you’re opening yourself up to meeting even more men that could be potential matches.

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You Only Need One

When you’re using online dating, you have to remember that you only need one good, quality man for a relationship.

You don’t need to attract several men that are perfect for you, just one. So, there’s no need to get discouraged if you haven’t found your match yet.

Some women join one dating site and after a few months or a year of using the same site without success, they get frustrated and want to give up on online dating altogether. But, that’s a bit hasty.

Just because you haven’t found a match on one dating site doesn’t mean you won’t find it on another.

Now, don’t stretch yourself too thin by joining too many online dating sites at once, but definitely open yourself up to more opportunities by joining more than one.

For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Till Next Time,

Dee

Did Your Boyfriend Make Time For You This Holiday?

Posted on January 3, 2015 by Dee's Dating Diary

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The holidays are a really great time to cherish your loved ones and spend as much quality time with them as possible.

From parents to siblings and friends, the holidays are a time for the people you truly love. No one wants to spend their precious free holiday time with frenemies.

With that being said, if you’re currently in a relationship, this past holiday was certainly a great opportunity to bond and enjoy each other’s company.

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Did Your Boyfriend Make Time For You This Holiday?

If you didn’t spend any time with your boyfriend this holiday and you’re not in a long distance relationship, it may be time to re-evaluate the quality and viability of your relationship.

Now, if you or your boyfriend had to work through the holiday, that’s definitely understandable.

But, if you’re in a committed relationship and your boyfriend has genuine feelings for you, he should have been making time to see you over the holiday.

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Stop Accepting Excuses

Some men will have excuses for every time they let you down, but it’s up to you as the woman to be more discerning about the person you’re dating.

Remember, people always make time for what they really want.

And, if you’re not what your boyfriend really wants, maybe he’s not who you should really want either. Just some food for thought.

For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Till Next Time,

Dee

Dee’s Dating Diary Celebrates Its 1-Year Anniversary!!

Posted on December 27, 2014 by Dee's Dating Diary

Wow, I can’t believe this December 29, 2014 will make one year since I started Dee’s Dating Diary.

When I launched this blog, I had no idea if it would be a success and now I’m truly overwhelmed at the positive response Dee’s Dating Diary has received.

We all know that dating can be very difficult. But, half of the battle is really about cultivating your mental and emotional stability and well-being.

Only A Quality Woman Deserves A Quality Man

What’s the point in attracting a quality man if your emotional baggage and neuroses is just going to run him off or ruin the relationship?

Dee’s Dating Diary is about inspiring women to make the necessary changes within themselves as well as making better decisions and choices in their dating lives. Decisions that promote great, loving, and healthy relationships.

If you devote yourself to making positive changes within yourself and with your dating habits, you will see positive changes in your dating life as well.

Thanks For Loving Dee’s Dating Diary

I know it can be time consuming to keep up with life as well as all your favorite blogs and internet sites, so I’m grateful for your interest and continued following of Dee’s Dating Diary!

For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Till Next Time,

Dee

Should You Burn Your Exes Things After A Break Up?

Posted on December 20, 2014 by Dee's Dating Diary

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Last week, I discussed whether you should keep your exes stuff after a break up. This week, I want to talk disposal methods!

Some women are so angry and hurt after a break up that they feel compelled to get rid of their exes things in the most destructive way possible.

From tearing pictures and other things a part to burning things altogether, some women think that destroying their exes stuff will make them feel better.

But, the truth this, it’s just an unnecessary waste of your time.

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Why Not Destroy His Stuff?

Going the destructive route often makes you much more emotional.

You have to remember that there’s no amount of ripping, tearing, or burning that will take away the hurt, pain, anger you feel from a break up.

Only in going through the natural course of the healing process will you truly feel better.

So, is it okay burn or destroy your exes things after a break up?

The answer is no.

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What Should You Do With Your Exes Stuff?

I know you’re thinking, “do I just throw everything in the trash then?”

Well, yes, that is an option, but you do have better ones.

You could donate your exes stuff to the Salvation Army, Goodwill, or any other organizations that accept these kinds of donations.

Or, you could even return the stuff to your ex if you are both capable of amicably handling that encounter.

No matter how you chose to get rid of your exes things, don’t make it more difficult for yourself by putting negative energy into that process.

For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Till Next Time,

Dee

Should You Keep Your Exes Stuff After A Break Up?

Posted on December 13, 2014 by Dee's Dating Diary

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During the course of a relationship, we usually cultivate many things from our partner. From gifts, to “borrowed” shirts and sweaters, it’s easy to rack up a lot of items from your boyfriend.

But, after a break up, should you be keeping any of these things?

The answer is no.

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Why You Shouldn’t Keep Your Exes Stuff

When you’re trying to get over a relationship, the last thing you need is to have a bunch of stuff around your house that constantly reminds you of your ex and the relationship you had.

Your exes stuff could send you into emotional lows and put you back in that sad place that you were in at the end of the relationship.

Keeping your exes stuff around definitely makes it more difficult to get over the relationship.

These little reminders of your ex will only prolong and delay the healing process after your break up.

And, this is definitely not what you want.

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Let’s Make A Distinction

For some women, yes, seeing an exes things or the gifts he gave can send them into emotional spirals.

But, there are some women who can break up with a boyfriend and not be emotionally affected by seeing some of his stuff.

Take for example, the sweater you took from your boyfriend and love wearing because it’s huge and super comfortable!

Some women might see this sweater after a break up and cry into it. While other women may continue to wear the sweater and simply enjoy its comfort with no emotional attachments or issues.

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Why Make This Distinction?

I have to make a distinction between women who can keep some of their exes things without being emotionally affected by it and women who can’t.

If you can separate the emotional attachments between your ex and certain items, then you don’t necessarily need to get rid of everything.

If your ex got you a gift that you’ve always wanted and you won’t be reminded of him every time you look at it, then there’s no need to junk the gift.

But, do keep in mind that even if you are great at separating your emotions from the gifts your ex gave you, a new boyfriend could have a problem with you keeping some of these things anyway.

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Why Do You Need Your Exes Stuff?

While it may seem harsh to get rid of your exes stuff after the relationship, sometimes it’s the healthiest thing you can do for yourself.

You don’t need a bunch of CDs, pictures, and other things to remind you of your ex.

At the end of the day, you’ll always have your memories and no one can take that from you.

So, don’t allow yourself to unnecessarily hold on to things from your past relationships.

For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Till Next Time,

Dee

Misplacing Anger After Being Cheated On

Posted on December 6, 2014 by Dee's Dating Diary

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A lot of women have experienced being cheated on. And, I’m sure we can all agree that it’s a very difficult thing to go through.

While it’s completely understandable to be upset and distraught after learning about your boyfriend’s cheating, what isn’t understandable is women’s misplaced anger in these situations.

Why is it that so many women get upset with the “other woman” their boyfriend is having an affair with instead of directing all their anger and hurt towards the man who actually made the commitment to them?

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Who’s In The Relationship?

When you enter a relationship or marriage, it’s you and your man that makes that commitment or takes those vows.

The woman who slept with your boyfriend or husband never made any commitment to you. She didn’t take any vows, she didn’t agree to exclusivity.

But, for some reason, the other woman is often held to a higher standard of accountability than the man that cheated.

The sad truth is, majority of the time, the man was never honest about the fact that he was in a relationship in the first place.

So, why would you ever want to fight, hurt, or harass the other woman that your man was telling lies to?

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Who’s Really To Blame?

Misplaced anger and aggression in cheating is a serious problem.

And, it takes away a lot of the man’s accountability and responsibility in the situation.

The man you decided to be in a relationship with cheats on you and you decide to stay in that relationship and punish the other woman? That sounds like a pretty sweet deal for your boyfriend!

But, why let your man avoid the full consequences of his actions when he’s the person who made the commitment to you?

The reality is, women who don’t know you, owe you nothing.

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Was The “Other Woman” Your Friend?

The only person you should be addressing when you’ve been cheated on is your boyfriend or husband. The other woman is not to blame!

Now, if you were friends with the other woman you certainly have a right to be upset with her.

I definitely don’t agree with any woman knowingly going after a taken man and if you find yourself in this kind of situation, then you do need to address the “other woman” in terms of your friendship with her.

But, this still doesn’t give you a pass to fight or harass your friend.

Obviously, this friend isn’t the type of woman you should continue being friends with, but having a civilized conversation about her own betrayal to you is necessary!

For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Till Next Time,

Dee

Why Many Marriages Fail

Posted on November 22, 2014 by Dee's Dating Diary

Image courtesy of Photostock at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

There isn’t a one-size fits all reason for why marriages fail.

But, there is a very common reason, outside of infidelity, that I do want to discuss.

Specifically, a lot of marriages fail because of the unexpressed expectations for a husband and wife.

Unexpressed and, therefore, unfulfilled expectations can set marriages up for failure long before they start.

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Heightened Expectations of Marriage

When you think of being married, you innately have an image in your head of what you expect your husband or wife to be.

There’s a lower threshold of responsibility and devotion in a relationship, but marriage naturally increases what you expect out of your now husband or wife.

No matter how you are during the relationship, both men and women will have heightened expectations for how you should act as their spouse.

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Examples of Heightened Expectations

A woman, for example, may expect her husband to pitch in more around the house.

A man may expect his wife to regularly cook dinner every night, despite the fact that she never cooked while they were dating.

Whatever it is that you picture in your head for a husband or wife is the heightened expectation you hold for the person you will one day marry.

The problem is when you go into a marriage with unspoken expectations and expect your spouse to meet them.

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Unexpressed Expectations

Remember, we are not all mind-readers. Unexpressed expectations will lead to unmet expectations, which can lead to an unhappy marriage and, ultimately, divorce.

So, you have to communicate!

BEFORE you get married, take the time to discuss your expectations of a husband and wife.

Your spouse may be ready and happy to meet your heightened expectations in a marriage, but if you don’t communicate your feelings to your spouse, you’re essentially setting them up for failure.

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Give Your Marriage a Fighting Chance

There’s nothing wrong with having expectations of a husband or wife, as long as they’re reasonable, of course.

But, don’t let your spouse get blindsided years into the marriage with what you’ve been expecting from them since the marriage ceremony!

Give your partner the opportunity to keep you happy in your marriage and express your expectations of a husband and wife!

For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Till Next Time,

Dee

Are You Lying About Your Relationship?

Posted on November 15, 2014 by Dee's Dating Diary

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I want to take the time to address women who are lying are about their relationships.

Specifically, women who lie about the length of their relationships.

Now, you may be thinking about the women who date a man for two weeks and round that time up to a month, but that’s not what I’m talking about here.

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The On-And-Off Couple

I’m sure you all know plenty of women who have been in one relationship that had a series of breakups throughout the relationship.

The couple dates for maybe 6 or 7 months, then breaks up, and then gets back together some months later.

I call these back and forth, on-and-off relationships “boomeranging.”

While I don’t agree with boomeranging because of the many problems that come along with it (See my post: No More Boomeranging!!), the delusion women have about the nature of these relationships is astounding.

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Lying About Your Relationship

When you talk to women who do this on-and-off dating, they are quick to tell you that they’ve dated a man for 4 years.

But, the truth is, they only dated for about 6 months out of each year.

So, when you really add up how much time they’ve been in a relationship, it’s usually far less than what they boast!

When you’ve been dating for a long time, of course you’re going to be proud of the length of time you’ve been together.

However, trying to deceive yourself and others about how long you’ve really been with a man only prevents you from accepting the nature of the relationship you truly have.

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Is The Relationship Worth Having?

Most likely, if you’ve been breaking up on and off several times throughout your relationship, it’s probably not a good one.

And, you shouldn’t be bragging or boasting to anyone about how long your relationship has lasted.

Be honest with yourself and other people, don’t inflate your relationship to be something that it’s not.

For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Till Next Time,

Dee

Where To Spend The Holidays When You’re In A Relationship

Posted on November 8, 2014 by Dee's Dating Diary

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The holidays are such a wonderful and joyous time!

But, when you’re in a relationship, it’s not always fun deciding which family to spend the holidays with.

I do have a simple tip for planning your future holidays, but, first, I think it’s important to acknowledge a significant problem women have during the holidays.

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The Unfortunate Holiday Compulsion

I often find that when women are in relationships, they tend to spend most, if not all, of their holidays with their boyfriend’s family instead of their own.

It’s seems all too easy for many women to forget about their own family and ingratiate themselves into their boyfriend’s family.

While there’s nothing wrong with spending quality time with your man’s family, it definitely becomes a problem when your own family doesn’t get to spend any time with you.

You can’t forsake your family on every holiday. You should still spend some of your holidays with your own family.

I’m not saying that you shouldn’t spend any holidays with your boyfriend’s family, you just need to maintain a balance and not forget about the people you grew up with.

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Tips For The Holidays

Instead of fighting over who’s family to spend the holidays with, divvy up the holidays between your two families.

Spend Thanksgiving with one family and Christmas with the other.

If there’s a particular holiday that is more important to your partner’s family than your own, spend that holiday with them.

You could also spend Christmas with your partner’s family one year and Christmas with your family the next year. This way, each family gets to enjoy you on different holidays each year.

Image courtesy of Photostock at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Is Family Important To You And Your Partner?

If spending time with your family isn’t as important to you as it is to your partner, then you should spend more holidays with your partner’s family.

HOWEVER, I will say, if you highly value family and your partner doesn’t, this could be the source of a lot of conflict in your relationship.

While I do believe that you don’t have to share every single value that your partner shares in order for a relationship to work (See my post: Do You Share The Same Values?), if you value family and your partner does not, this could end up being a serious deal breaker.

If you intend to start a family with your partner one day, you’ll want him or her to value the family you’ve created.

But, if your partner doesn’t value their own family now, how much will they really value the family you create together? Think about that!

For more great dating advice, check out my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Till Next Time,

Dee

Why You Shouldn’t Change Your Facebook Relationship Status

Posted on November 1, 2014 by Dee's Dating Diary

Image courtesy of TungPhoto at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Facebook was created as on online medium to stay connected with friends, but, in truth, it’s a forum that showcases every last thing about your personal life.

While you do have the ability to change your privacy settings on Facebook and control who sees what content, the majority of Facebook users (both men and women) are putting way too much information about themselves on their Facebook profiles.

Specifically, when it comes to Facebook relationship statuses, many women tend to broadcast each and every one of their relationships to the Facebook world.

Image courtesy of Arztsamui at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

When Is It Ok To Change Your Facebook Relationship Status?

Unless you’re married, you should never put your relationship status on Facebook.

Many of the people you’re “friends” with on Facebook aren’t actually your real friends, so you shouldn’t be sharing all your relationships with them.

Truly, it’s nobody’s business on Facebook to know when and who you are in a relationship with.

As you get older and cultivate more Facebook friends that are co-workers and people you met in networking or business events, you especially don’t need to share details about your personal life.

Image courtesy of Witthaya Phonsawat at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Why You Shouldn’t Change Your Relationship Status On Facebook

I know a lot of you are probably fighting this piece of dating advice, but think about how bad you’ve felt when you’ve had to change your relationship status back to single and you get bombarded with questions directly on your Facebook wall about why the relationship ended.

When you’re Facebook “friends” ask, “Oh my goodness, are you okay,” and “what happened,” on your wall do you really want to respond to these questions directly on your Facebook wall as well? Of course not!

The truth is, no one wants to answer relationship questions on their Facebook wall or any public forum for that matter.

But, because you put your relationship on blast on Facebook, you opened yourself up to people you barely know and friends with bad Facebook etiquette asking you seriously personal questions in a public forum where you wouldn’t want to answer them.

Another reason why you shouldn’t share you’re relationship status on Facebook is that you don’t want everyone on Facebook keeping track of the number of relationships that you’ve had.

Image courtesy of Graur Codrin at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

You’re Single Until You’re Married

Remember, you’re single until you’re married!

When you’re filling out applications or forms, you can only select single, married, or divorced. There’s no box to select for “in a relationship” or “it’s complicated.”

Since you’re single until you’re married, your Facebook relationship status should reflect that!

When you’re married, you can freely and happily broadcast that on Facebook, but until that time keep your relationship status as “single” on your Facebook and other social media accounts.

For more great dating advice, check out my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Till Next Time,

Dee

10 Tips For Safe Online Dating

Posted on October 25, 2014 by Dee's Dating Diary

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Online dating has quickly gained momentum in the past decade, but online dating safety can’t be ignored.

Although more and more people are meeting their husbands and wives through online dating, it’s still very important for you to take safety precautions on your online dates!

In fact, for some people, it’s the safety concerns that keep them from giving online dating a chance.

So, I want to give some great tips to help you be safe when jumping into the online dating pool.

Image courtesy of Anankkml at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

10 Tips For Safe Online Dating:

1. Never Put More Than Just A City Location On Your Online Dating Profile

While your online dating profile does allow you to display the city you’re located in, putting any additional information on your profile about your location is dangerous.

This includes the name of your neighborhood, apartment complex, or any nearby landmarks. Online dating users should never know anything more than the general city and state that you live in.

If someone asks you for more information or details about where you live, don’t tell them!!

Image courtesy of Patrisyu at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

2. Get To Know Your Potential Online Dates Before Meeting Them

Spend time getting to know the person you’re talking to before going on a date. It’s hard to give an exact timeframe on how long you should wait before meeting an online date because each situation is different.

But, in general, if you’re speaking on the phone frequently (almost everyday or every other day), you can meet in person 2-3 weeks after meeting online (at minimum). However, always use your own best judgment in deciding how soon to meet an online date!

3. Never Have Your First Few Dates At Your Home Or Your Date’s Home

Having your first online date at a home is a really bad idea! You should never meet a person that you don’t know in a private place where it will only be the two of you.

You first few online dates should always be at public places with lots of people! If this is a problem for you, then online dating isn’t a resource that you should use.

Image courtesy of Adamr at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

4. Tell Your Close Friends or Family That You’re Going On An Online Date

While many people are still weary about letting others know that they use online dating, you can’t keep this information to yourself if you’re going to go on any online dates!

It’s important that someone close to you knows that you’re using online dating in case anything happens to you.

There is certain information that you need to give your loved ones if you choose to go on an online date. Which brings me to my next tip…

5. Give A Close Friend or Family Member Your Date’s Information

Before you go on your online date, make sure you provide a close friend or family member with the following information about your online date:

1. Your Date’s Username

2. Your Date’s Full Name

3. Your Date’s Phone Number

4. The Location of Your Date

5. The Time of Your Date

Giving this information to a close friend will ensure that someone knows who, where, and what you will be doing in case something happens.

If your friend knows that you’re going to dinner, but doesn’t hear back from you within 3-4 hours after your date started, then they can call you to make sure you made it home safely or take any other appropriate action.

Image courtesy of StockImages at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

6. Text Your Date’s License Plate Number, If Possible

If at all possible, when you get to the date location, text your date’s license plate number to a friend in addition to providing the information in Tip #5.

This is if you have the opportunity to do this, of course. If not, the other information you provided from Tip #5 should be enough.

*You could also take a picture of the license plate by pretending to take a selfie.

7. Have A Friend or Family Member Accompany You On the Date

If you’re extremely nervous about your safety on an online date, you can also have a friend or two go to the restaurant or bar where the date is and have them hang out there during your date.

You definitely don’t want your online date to know that the both of you are being watched, so have your friends sit somewhere far enough that they won’t be noticed by your date but close enough too monitor what’s going on during the date.

Image courtesy of Digitalart at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

8. Drive Your Own Car To The Online Date

Always drive your own car to meet your online date. Never allow a date to pick you up from your home or anywhere else for that matter!

You’d be putting way too much control in your date’s hands by allowing them to pick you up. Be in control of yourself and drive your car to your date!

9. Tell Your Friend When You Make It Home From Your Date

Don’t leave your friends or family in agonizing misery about what’s happening to you on your online date.

As soon as the date is over, don’t forget to shoot your friend a text saying you made it home safely so they can stop worrying about you!

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

10. If It Doesn’t Feel Right, DON’T GO!!

NEVER go on a date with someone you met online if they have made you feel uncomfortable in any way or nervous about your safety on a date.

Always trust your gut! If it doesn’t feel right, it isn’t!

Stay Safe

While I am an advocate of online dating, I don’t believe that you should ever ignore your gut feelings about a date! So, pay close attention to your instincts and follow these tips for being safe on your online dates!

For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Till Next Time,

Dee

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How to Create A Great Online Dating Profile

Posted on October 18, 2014 by Dee's Dating Diary

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

With online dating becoming more popular and widespread, building a great online dating profile is a must!

While some people do use online dating as a superficial picture shopping forum, there are many people that actually take the time to read online dating profiles.

So, you definitely want to say a little about who you are and what you’re looking for.

Image courtesy of StockImages at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Writing About Yourself

When you’re writing in the “about yourself” section of your profile, you only need 1 paragraph.

And, this paragraph should be no more than 3-5 sentences long.

You need to think critically about who you are. Play up your best and most important characteristics.

If you’re having a hard time describing yourself, think about how your family and friends would describe you.

If you still can’t come up with anything, then reach out to friends and family and ask them how they would describe you.

Image courtesy of Vichaya Kiatying-Angsulee at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Writing About What You’re Looking For

You definitely need to seriously evaluate what you want in a partner. I’m not talking about superficial things like looks, physique, or money.

I’m talking about those important qualities that you need in a partner.

So, now is the time to distinguish between your wants and your needs!

If you need more help figuring out what you need in a partner and relationship, check out my post “Is Your Laundry List Holding You Back From Getting A Quality Man?”

Image courtesy of StockImages at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Is There Too Much Information On Your Dating Profile?

Ultimately, your online dating profile only needs just enough information to tantalize potential dates and leave them wanting to get to know more about you.

I’ve seen numerous profiles where people have divulged their entire life story or listed every last detail about themselves and what they like, and, unfortunately, these profiles don’t cultivate much attention.

While it is important to write about yourself and the qualities you want in a person, you never want anyone to think that they know exactly who you are based solely on reading your profile.

I know this may seem counterintuitive for some people, perhaps you thought more is better!!

But, trust me, it’s much easier for people to make snap judgments about your compatibility and whether you’re a date worth pursuing when you give too much information on your profile.

Even if you left out some small details here and there on your profile, you better believe that people will fill in those small gaps with their own assumptions. Whether those assumptions are true or not.

Image courtesy of StockImages at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Are You Limiting Your Date Conversation?

When it comes to writing about the movies, songs, and books a person likes, I’ve seen many profiles that list well over 30-50 items and this is definitely overkill!

When you write about every last movie, song, or book you like, you leave no room for these topics to become conversation points on your dates.

Don’t take away a lot of the great conversation you could have on your date by putting too much information on your dating profile.

Reel your dates in by leaving enough curiosity to ponder, which means keep your online dating profiles short and sweet!!

Image courtesy of Marcolm at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Need More Help With Your Online Dating Profile?

Do you think your online dating profile needs a makeover? Have you been using an online dating site for months, but aren’t getting the attention you want?

Or, do you need help creating your first online dating profile?

Well, Dee’s Dating Diary is here to help! I can help transform your profile from a dud to a stud!

Give yourself a fighting chance with online dating, contact Dee’s Dating Diary today at Dee@DeesDatingDiary.com.

For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Till Next Time,

Dee

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5 Tips For Better Online Dating Profile Pictures

Posted on October 11, 2014 by Dee's Dating Diary

Image courtesy of StockImages at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

When you create a profile on an online dating website, you hope that you’ll get lots of messages and meet your perfect match.

But, what many people don’t realize when they create their online dating profiles is that your profile pictures are the most important aspect of your dating profile.

Image courtesy of StockImages at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Online Dating Increases Superficiality

There’s something about online dating that enables and even pushes people to use it in a superficial way.

Perhaps it’s the structure of having pages that show tons of profiles with a quick synopsis consisting of just a picture, location, and tagline, that promotes the behavior of picking dates or determining interest based on pictures alone.

While there shouldn’t be such a strong emphasis on profile pictures, the reality is, most people pick online dates based solely on profile pictures.

Many people won’t take the time to read your entire profile, but they will definitely go through all of your pictures. Well, that’s if your main profile picture has caught their attention in the first place.

Although you don’t want to date someone who picks dates based on looks alone, the sad truth is, even good people fall victim to the online dating photo shopping mentality.

So, considering how important it is to have great profile pictures in order to drive attention to your online dating profile, I want to give you 5 great tips for your dating profile pics!

5 Tips For Creating Better Online Dating Profile Pictures:

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

1. No Blurry Pictures

This is pretty self explanatory, but you should never put blurry pictures of yourself on your online dating profile or you might as well hide your face altogether.

Your pictures are supposed to let people know what you look like.

But, when you put blurry pictures on your profile it can be deceiving or give someone the impression that you have something to hide. Be honest and show who you really are.

2. No Pictures of Pictures

Profile pictures are supposed to show the best you. But, even if the best picture of you only exists in hard copy and there’s no digital version, you still CANNOT take a picture of that picture.

Let’s be honest too, if your best picture is only in the form of a hard copy and there’s no digital copy as well, the picture is way too old to be used on your dating profile.

With the advancements of technology, there’s no reason why you should have to take a picture of a printed photo.

Image courtesy of ImageryMajestic at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

3. No Pictures With People of The Opposite Sex

You should never use pictures of yourself with someone of the opposite sex because you can give people the wrong impression about the relationship you have with that person.

I know many women that have later found out that the woman in a picture with their online date was actually the man’s wife or girlfriend. And, these experiences lead women to mistrust and write off other men who have women in their profile pictures.

Even if the person in your picture is truthfully just a friend, you don’t want to give prospective matches the opportunity to make a snap judgment about who you’re with in your pictures and move on to the next profile.

Don’t give anyone the chance to fill in the blanks about the relationships you have with people in your pictures.

4. No Less Than 3 Pictures on Your Profile, But No More than 5

Your online dating profile pictures should consist of 1 or 2 head shots, 1 or 2 full body shots, and an optional activity photo that shows you doing an activity or hobby you enjoy.

You want to give a little variety in your pictures to give someone a better sense of what you actually look like. When you only use one picture or a few pictures that show you from the same exact angle, you’re not allowing a person to know what you really look like.

We all know that sometimes a person’s “best angle” isn’t necessarily a good reflection of how the person normally looks!

5. Your Pictures Cannot Be More Than A Year Old

This is a pretty straight forward tip, you know why you shouldn’t use old pictures on your dating profile. Your profile is supposed to show people what you currently look like, not what you looked like in your best years or at your lowest weight.

There is an exception to this rule though… If you’re one of those people who always looks the same and doesn’t really age, you can use an older picture of yourself as long as you look the same exact way today.

If you have pictures that are less than a year old but you’ve changed your look, then you need to take new pictures for your profile. So, if you’ve change your hair, lost a lot of weight, or gained a lot of weight, you need to take new photos and update your profile pictures!

Need More Help With Your Dating Profile Pictures?

While you don’t need to use a professional photographer to take your pictures for your online dating profile, you can use an online dating photographer who will take natural pictures that will capture your true and realistic beauty.

If you live in the UK and you’re interested in taking pictures with an online dating photographer, check out this Facebook page: Saturday Night’s Alright.

If you live in the US and would like referrals for online dating photographers, email me at Dee@DeesDatingDiary.com.

Don’t forget, I’ve dedicated the month of October to online dating, so stay tuned for more great online dating tips to come!!

For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Till Next Time,

Dee

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Posted on October 4, 2014 by Dee's Dating Diary

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

In this technologically advanced era, online dating has quickly gained momentum in the dating world.

Before the creation of online dating, meeting a potential dating partner meant going out to events, parties, and different social settings to meet that special person.

But, with the internet, social media, and advent of phone apps, daily face to face human interactions has significantly decreased.

And, with decreased face to face interactions, online dating provides a platform for people to still connect, interact, and date.

Image courtesy of Brian Holm at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Online Dating Has Changed The Dating Game

While most people are hidden behind their phones, computers, and other devices, preventing them from having meaningful interactions with new people, online dating provides a great opportunity to meet potential matches.

What was once considered to be extremely taboo is now acceptable and actually pretty commonplace.

In fact, online dating has shaped much of today’s dating interactions.

More and more people are meeting their husbands and wives through online dating websites.

Image courtesy of ImageryMajestic at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Is It Time To Try Online Dating?

If you’re single and hesitant to pursue online dating because of the negative connotations that existed when online dating first hit the scene, it’s time to start rethinking your position!

If you find it easy to meet new people to date, then online dating isn’t a resource that you have to force yourself to use.

However, if you’re often busy, work a lot, or have the kind of lifestyle that prevents you from meeting new people, then online dating is a resource you should definitely consider using!

Image courtesy of Photostock at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Safety Risks In Online Dating

Although online dating can still present some safety risks, taking the proper precautions can alleviate many of the risks that have been associated with online dating.

For example, your first few dates should always be at a public place with lots of people.

But, don’t worry, I’ll address all the necessary safety precautions you should take in online dating this month!

I have officially dedicated the month of October to online dating. All of my posts this month will provide valuable advice for pursuing your online dating life. So, stay tuned!

For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Till Next Time,

Dee

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Posted on September 27, 2014 by Dee's Dating Diary

Image courtesy of Vichaya Kiatying-Angsulee at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Although we live in an era where men and women are getting married at much older ages, this shift hasn’t affected men as much as it has affected women.

Society accepts men being “bachelors” for a longer period of time now. Man can live the bachelor life well into their 30’s without repercussions.

And, in contrast to women, when men are ready to settle down in a relationship in their older age, they are still considered very eligible bachelors.

But, when a woman is over 30, she isn’t necessarily viewed as a very “eligible” bachelorette.

Image courtesy of Ambro at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Why The Pressure to Get Married?

Most women in their mid 20’s or even earlier start feeling pressure from their family or friends to find a boyfriend, get married, and have kids.

Most of our parents and grandparents grew up in an era where getting married at a young age was the norm.

Women went from their parent’s house straight to their husband’s house and being married by 18 wasn’t seen the way it is today.

With this, you can understand why older generations don’t necessarily understand a woman’s choice to remain single past the age of about 20.

Image courtesy of Adamr at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

The Double Standard

It’s a shame that as a single woman ages, sometimes her value in the eyes of the world tends to decrease while a man’s value tends to increase as he ages.

It’s a clear double standard.

Men age, cultivate their careers, and build their wealth and this makes them more desirable, eligible bachelors to women.

But, it’s not necessarily the same for women. A 40-year old man with his career together is more sought after than a 40 year old woman with her career and life together.

Image courtesy of Kongsky at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Why Fight The Pressure to Get Married?

Here’s the problem…

If you do fall victim to society’s pressure to get married before you’ve met your match, you’ll quickly pick and marry a man who isn’t right for you.

You’ll settle. You’ll let go of all those things you’ve wanted for yourself and pretty much just take what you can get at the moment.

Because, time is of the essence right?

When you feel pressure to be married, you have to remember that settling for any man won’t make you happy in the long run!

Image courtesy of Witthaya Phonsawat at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Whose Life Is It?

While your family and friends may encourage you to settle down with someone who isn’t right for you, you have to remember that it’s YOU who has to be with this person for the rest of your life, not your family or friends!

Your family and friends won’t have to deal with those problems that come with dating and marrying the wrong person, you will!!

Despite the world wanting you to be married, you can’t let this run you into the arms of Mr. Wrong.

Hold out for your Mr. Right, as hard as that may be! He will come along one day and the wait will certainly be worth it!!

Stay strong my single ladies!

For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Till Next Time,

Dee

Are You Turning Men or Women Off On Dates?

Posted on September 20, 2014 by Dee's Dating Diary

Image courtesy of ImageryMajestic at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

On first dates, you’re essentially selling your best self!

First dates are your opportunity to show a person the best of who you are, whatever that may be.

Ultimately, people fall in love for the good in someone, not the bad.

Image courtesy of Photostock at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Accentuate The Positive

The reality is, you attract people with positive points not negative ones. So, you should always lead with the positive!

Once a person likes you, he or she can more easily overlook your flaws.

But, when you lay your problems on the table too soon, you can easily scare a person off.

When your dates reflect back on the time you both shared together, you want them to have positive feelings about you and the experience.

You definitely don’t want to leave a bitter taste in their mouth. But, when you bring up your problems on first dates, that’s exactly what you do!

Compare with Friendships

Think about your friendships. It’s the good things about your friends and the positive times shared that built and strengthened the friendship.

We all learn about flaws that we may not necessarily care for in our friends, but we accept those flaws. And, why is this?

It’s because of the positive foundation that the friendship was built on.

Taking this analogy back to dating… Once you’ve started to build the foundation of your relationship, a person can easily overlook your flaws and accept you for the complete person that you are.

But, when you put your flaws on the table on your first few dates, you’re just giving your date reasons to write you off for a potential relationship.

Image courtesy of Nuttakit at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Your Date Will Learn With Time

We all know that no one is perfect, but there’s really no point in even talking about your issues on first dates because, in time, they will all be known anyway!

A new person you’re dating should learn about your flaws naturally, in the course of dating and getting to know you. Not because you threw it in his or her face.

Putting yourself down won’t get you positive results in dating, so leave the negative feelings about yourself at the door and remember to accentuate your positives!!

For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Till Next Time,

Dee

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Posted on September 13, 2014 by Dee's Dating Diary

Image courtesy of StockImages at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

First dates are crucial in determining whether someone will be a good match. In a world where people make snap judgments about each other, it’s extremely important to put your best foot forward on your dates.

A first date is your opportunity to make a connection and enjoy your time with your date.

But, there are things that can get in the way of you making a great connection on a good date.

Image courtesy of Photostock at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

When You Should Cancel Your Date

A serious problem I’ve often seen with women is their decision to go on a date when they’ve had a bad day.

Now, I’m not just talking about any bad day. I’m talking about the kind of bad day that leaves you bitter, defensive, and on the brink of an emotional outburst.

I’ve seen women get aggressive, take simple statements or compliments the wrong way, make offensive remarks, and even take anger out on their date. All because they had a terrible day at work.

No one is immune from having a bad day, but not everyone has the ability to have a bad day and then go on a date with a positive, upbeat attitude.

If this is you, then it’s time to add this rule to your rulebook: If you’ve had a bad day and won’t be able to maintain a positive, friendly, and upbeat attitude then you need to cancel your date and reschedule for another day.

Image courtesy of Serge Bertasius at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

It’s A Risk Worth Taking

You may be thinking, “I don’t want to cancel the date just because I’ve had a bad day! What if he doesn’t want to reschedule?”

But, think about it like this, it’s better to take that chance and cancel the date because if you do go on the date with a bad attitude, you’re definitely going to cross yourself off as a potential dating partner.

Better you try to reschedule the date than leave a bitter taste in your date’s mouth.

Plus, if a person is really interested in getting to know you, rescheduling the date shouldn’t be a problem!

Image courtesy of Ambro at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

When Is It Okay NOT to Cancel The Date?

Once you’ve been on several dates, this rule doesn’t necessarily apply.

Because, if you really want to build a future with someone, you will go through ups and downs together and you need to know that your partner can give you the support and encouragement you need during difficult times.

But, this still does not give you a pass to have attitude or treat your date or boyfriend poorly.

So, the next time your bad day coincides with a date, give yourself time to readjust your attitude and reschedule the date for another day!

For more great dating advice, get my book: Picking up the Pieces: Rebuilding Yourself for the Love and Relationship You Deserve.

Till Next Time,

Dee

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Posted on September 6, 2014 by Dee's Dating Diary

Image courtesy of StockImages at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Many women have an image of who their ideal partner would be based on certain characteristics they possess. The problem? Their laundry list.

The Laundry List

A laundry list is basically a list of things a woman wants in a man.

The problem with the laundry list is that most of the attributes on these lists don’t necessarily speak to a man being a quality person that you should date.

Many women’s laundry list reads like this: Must make over 100k (or insert any amount here), must be physically fit, must be tall, must have this type of car, and the list goes on.

While it’s definitely necessary to have an idea of the type of man that’s a good match for you, your laundry list should have more depth. The items on this list should address qualities that are common to good men.

Image courtesy of Digitalart at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Make A Viable List

Here’s a helpful exercise to help you widdle down your laundry list to the most important qualities you want in a man.

First, write down all the things you feel you want in a long term partner.

Second, choose 3 to 5 items on your list that aren’t references to superficial qualities.

Superficial qualities would be income, physique, car, etc. These things are superficial because they can easily change and don’t address any characteristics that make up a good man.

These 3 to 5 items are the only items that you should deeply contemplate when picking a man to date.